chuck

omg i feel so sick to my stomach Im hoping that no one moves in next door this weekend, however my gut is telling me otherwise. I have to buckle down and get these last two assignments done tonight and tomorrow. by monday for certain that way i...

give up

Depressed as hell and ready to not bother. I cancelled my therapeutic riding and went swimming instead. No dance no boxing why bother  I don't want to try anymore. Cuz nothing works out anyways. Dancing gyms boxing school counselling etc So why...

nothing.

im officially headed to a breakdown. Im so fn sleep deprived and angry and just fed up and disgusted with my circumstances. i can hardly stop crying i go from crying to wanting to kill someone literally. no exaggeration. eventually i am...

losing my best friend

morning feeling very very very very very lonesome today. I am so tired of not having any friends, and finding it nearly impossible to make any. I am so dependent on my mom and when she hits her crazy switch or thinks im being too clingy she...

discriminating cops

Little pieces of shit from next door were hassling me last night. I come home from walking and the black kid is sitting on the bench across the street from us. He says dont look at me you fuckn cat lady bitch.? i said excuse me i can look any...

too fast.

morning my esmeralda is slowing down; i think she is losing it too; dementia / alzheimers in cats etc. I adopted Esmeralda in 1999 and she was 3 when i got her. :( She has been with me from a young woman to middle aged. I cant even begin...

get er done

wow people are touchy. you cant even ask a question without them biting your face off yesterday i went to moms to workout in the pool and she thinks that means we are "off" for today feel the love. i helped them do yard work too. she...

mortals

havent been feeling very well the last few days. kind of tired and wore down. throat hurts and my ears a bit too. feel like im never getting enough sleep. ya i feel like my lungs are heavy even.... tired. pooped exhausted. I am thinking...

wow.

morning so im fighting with the weepies/ sadness and depression again. I feel kind of disappointed with the course being over....my anxiety and the social context was so stressful and unpleasant most of the time, that i feel like it never even...

buzzin

~ something brewing in the back of my mind.... what about a dance studio or a dance collective like they have in toronto or did when i danced. a studio space with various teachers wtih whom to train.... or a dance fitness studio where a...

Simeon

I have been thinking about Simeon a lot these days. Feeling haunted and thinking I should have done things differently maybe. I have regrets but I knew no better. I loved her more than I love myself. Had I of known I would have done better maybe. I...

between

journeys we are all on a journey every minute of every day one foot in front of the other..... one roll of our wheels location to location constantly moving and dancing through life we are never really still if we are alive and breathing....

safe

just a brief touching base.... so friday night past we had a swat team at our building because the drug dealing pieces of shit on the opposite side of the building that she has newly rented to, were pointing a gun out their front window at people...